Yet another Outburst

I wish I sleep tonight and never wake up again, never see the Sun again, take the memories of this dark sans-moon night in my eyes and close them forever...
I wish I never see anyone of the people-with whom I've shared my life of 20 yrs.-again. I am just so sick. So tired. So exhausted. So spent.
Rational thinking has given way and now I only wish I had never lived that day, when the truth was revealed, when my beliefs shattered. When i felt like an orphan.

Yes. I could never rise above that fact. And i could not even live with it. So, i chose the mid-way. I chose to hate those very people who, once upon a time & for the most part of my life, were my life.

It was difficult, ask me. But i was determined not to get hurt by anyone after that one incident. I kept my stride. I always won. I would hurt people, so they wouldn't, couldn't, hurt me back. But, i was only a loser. War has no victors. My soul would die, daily...a part of it.

I would sneer at my people- at their agony, at my victory- victory over something certainly unknown. But when i woke up, when- for a second- I saw the world around me without the glasses of hatred on, I saw my own people- agonized, pained, suffering.

I realized what i had done was not to them, but to my own mortal self. As it is, life is never an exam where u could cut out the whole answer attempted wrongly and make a fresh beginning. It is about life. If i do it wrong, it is wrong forever.

I wish i dont wake up tomorrow, or any morrow for that matter...

ek ghaav tha, jo bhar gaya...ek nishaan hai, jo reh gaya.

He and I were completely engrossed in each other, only, he was 50 kms. away and I was on the middle of a road, trying to cross it to reach the station that would take me to him.
As i put a step forward, my heart and mind still with him, my knee jerked and the first step I took brought me down, right on my knees.
It was a wound. But, with my heart and mind still with him, I knew nothing could possibly go wrong. That that was nothing.
Though afterwards, he did tell me how awful the wound was and that i must tend to it.
But i, being myself, ignored it out of the fear of ignoring him.
Now i realize. I did not have my eyes on the path that i had chosen & so, I got hurt-right at the place where it hurt the most.

Now, though the wound has healed, the scar remains. And THIS is everything I have of him...of us.

Forgotten

Closing my eyes, I force a beautiful scene to play and replay before them;
The scene that had u and me, that had love and passion
But my eyes open, to a horrible today, when u are gone;
When I realize I am without u alive, alone and
FORGOTTEN…

With you, summers were sunny, now they sweat
With you, rains meant passion, now they are only wet
With you, winters were a hot cup of coffee, now they are cold.
With you, I was one in a million, now…just another in a million..
FORGOTTEN…

You have chosen your path; I shall trudge alone, on my own.
But your memories, them shall I cherish dawn after every dawn…

When i was my daddy's lil girl...

Walking down the memory lane, I see a young girl, anticipation brimming her two big eyes as the clock showed 5:30 in the evening, the time when she would hear her papa's footsteps trudging urgently up the stairs.
Putting all her homework aside, proud of completing it in scheduled time yet again, she searched for a new place to hide in their small home.
She played the whole sequence of actions in her mind again & again and laughed and clapped happily to herself.
She loved her papa. This love was different. She thought if there was one person who could be perfect, it was him.If he said something, it was more of a psalm than a statement. She adored him since when she did not even know what “to adore” meant.

Then…she grew up.

Now, when he, as usual, returned from work at 5:30, a couple of things had changed. Firstly, a new fancy and huge apartment took p[lace of their relatively poor home and secondly, she knew what “to adore” meant and certainly had changed preferences.
Life was its mechanical self where human emotions do not lubricate the wagon to move forward but only increase friction to develop heat among relationships.
This small girl, now big, was me.

And then came one day when my mother’s friend, with her 8 month old girlie, visited us.
It poured heavily and God was in no mood to relent his decision for the less privileged.
The baby grew restless as the minutes converted into hours and she still had no sight of her father.

Then, fighting the winds and the water, he arrived. That was the moment when I bade them goodbye that made me ponder- When did I grow up?? Why did I grow up??

We waited outside our apartment for him to arrive. At the first sight of his, she threw an electric smile. And when they, her mother holding her, sat pillion to her father, she grew so ecstatic that she jumped on her lil space that she stood on and beat his helmet while chuckling a perfect baby laugh.

All he had to do was take her in his arms and she clung on to him as if making up for the time when she missed him and he wasn’t there…

I saw all this & could think of only one thing while their vehicle paced out of my vision- What if she grows up and realizes that she WAS once her daddy’s lil girl…??

The thought left a vacuum in me...

Khulaasaa...the first-hand experience

Hey all!

As usual, my absence has been prolonged. Anyways, without much a-do, I switch to the main point…

It had rained throughout the previous night and it seemed that the Gods had no plan to alter their plan. So, with my lungs full of fresh, moist Monday morning air, I somehow succeeded to cajole my father to drop me to the bus-stop. Oh, by the way, I work as a summer intern with MoserBaer (naam to suna hi hoga…!). So, waiting for the chartered bus to arrive, I opened my latest novel, the color purple, and started from the first page. I mustn’t have read more than 6 pages when the bus arrived. Feeling an adrenalin rush on seeing the bus after 4 strange days felt even stranger and abruptly, I promised myself to have a successful and a work-loaded day. But sometimes, your resolves stand sterile in front of other men’s vice. I had heard a fleeting talk about “Desh Band” today… but never had the thought struck that it would affect me and I would find myself cursing the whole system vehemently.

We boarded the bus as usual, got ourselves a seat (reserved for ‘ladies’) and I resumed my reading. We had hardly gone 3 kms that I saw unusual activity going on right in the middle of the busiest crossing of that national highway. It was the political party activists. At first, I could only see a lady, clad simply in a worn-out saree, carrying the party’s orange and green lotus flag in one hand and a 2 ltr plastic bottle of a soft drink filled with some wine-colored liquid in the other. Till then, the gravity of the situation hadn’t hit me. And since the weather was favorable and the air was soothingly cool, I dint bother myself too. Suddenly, I saw a man rushing towards our bus as it was put to a sudden halt. He was swearing at the driver and was gesturing putting a match to the bus if we dint vacate it. I was still composed coz till everything remained verbal, I was OK, I thought. But the scene got worse when they deflated the tyres of the bus and set some more tyres on fire, right in the middle, on the very crossing where the lady has first stood. There was a gang of atleast 20-25 people who were shouting out loudly and making sure no public transport shall pass through that crossing.

We were advised to take a U-turn and head back home, ofcourse on-foot. When I say “we”, I mean the girls in the bus. The very next minute, we saw ourselves marching over the flyover in a queue, like ants. At that moment, the water coagulated on the sides where we walked and made the route back home even more dreadful. My delicate slippers dint know what lay ahead, later in the day and I know, they were the worst sufferers. We vented throughout. We cursed the system. Atleast I did. This wasn’t really the idea of an educated common man to present his demands. But then, not everyone can refuse to get paid for the daily bread without having to earn it though a day’s hard-work, but a slice of violence.

It is surprisingly sad how the damned people carry out such obscene jobs at the name of “public welfare”, at the very expense of that very common public, the aam aadmi.

Hibernated

Hi to all!!!
No excuses to be heard or produced, no fallacy accepted! My absence from what I call my “heart n soul” has been disappointing and uncalled for.
Yet, I guess it took some time to get over a bad phase, to come full circle. All for good!! J
Kalaakaar ki koi kadra hi nahi hai… TRUE!!!
Just now I have been ushered out of my room, that I share with my pokey brother. The reason was simple to understand but difficult to comprehend. He could not sleep when I was busy writing. The sound of punching keys on the keyboard disturbed him. And then the next thing I saw was my father, looking much older due to such petty arguments, entering the room. I could tell he looked old. The light casted a submissive portrait of a man, shoulders slumped, forehead creased. At that time, I knew I didn’t want to be a misery to him. So without much further arguments, I decided to still pursue what I should have been doing regularly, compromising the air-conditioned room and my cozy bed.
Anyhow, since I last posted something here, there have been numerous changes, mostly for good, happening at me end. Take for example- my, otherwise strict-regimed family- the one to follow “Early to bed, early to rise” principle- granted my earnest request and took me to “Bangla Sahib Gurudwara” as early as 6 in the morning. Ofcourse, we had never done such an “outing” before and for them, it was no less than crazy. But I fancied it. I loved it more than I fancied it. I admired it more than I loved it. It was a déjà vu feeling to me. Like at “Darbar Sahib”, Amritsar. I wish I the sun never came up as harsh as it was then, and I could hang around the place whole day long. It was soothing. It was comforting.
And then the scariest thing happened. The E.X.A.M.S., of course!!!Those who know me right know that I am not a person to be deterred by such (mis)happenings. However, these developments do change your regime and suddenly you see yourself out of thecomfortable bubble which had held you for long. You go helter-skelter, collecting last minute notes, taking all “daadi maa k nuskhe” to enhance your memory level. Suddenly, the household budget goes up as the coffee jar has to be replenished every other night. You become the resident of a third-world country where no movies are screened, people don’t party. The facebook status messages only reinforce the plight of the agonized students. Some swear on the subject and its originator, while others settle for the teacher teaching the same.
But, soon, they pass. So did mine. The moment came very late that I realized that I am relieved off the burden of projects, assignments and exams for more than a couple of months! Of late, I have been planning grandly to spend my summers in an unusual way, the “learning” way. But now, all I want is- sleep, food, friends, hills, more food, more sleep, more hang outs and as usual, more trips…
They realization of my freedom came by the way of a family dinner. It had long been anticipated but couldn’t be materialized coz of some prior commitment or such. I knew I was sleep-deprived. I knew I had to mind my ways. But once there, I let it go. They are the people I belong with. My sis-in-law (how I hate that word!!! If I had it my way, I’d rather call her my sis) and I are almost on the same wavelength when it comes to thoughts and ideas. And my sis, no word in the world can explain what a darling she is. U know u can’t expect a 22 year old to be so naïve, so pure at heart. I feel stupid and sad when I think of all the time that we both couldn’t be as good sisters. But now that we are, I think we really gel along very well.
So, my sis-in-law and I share the same zest for literature and nature (whoo! That rhymed). U maroon the two of us in a room full of books and a sumptuous supply of food to last us days and weeks, and u’llfind us healthy as horse even after an eternity. We talk about just anything and everything under the sun. I never knew I could confide in her. Its her birthday today…
Happy Birthday, Bhabi!! May God Bless You with all that you want and deserve!!! J
And so, when our talks never seem to cease, my sis calls it the “Chipmunk Transactions”. Lol!! This proximity to them makes me wonder- when we were a joint family, we were never together. Now that we are separated, we vouch for togetherness… Strange!
Each day teaches you one thing or the other…for me, the process of learning just never ends…Like there is too much to learn in such short span. Like I never knew in case of emergency, if u get trapped inside your car, u just have to push the windscreen with your feet with all your force and it’ll come off. Aaj ka lesson.
OK! So, the final word is that the blogger in me has come out of hibernation and now, it’s the full moon time for blogging!
Hoping for eventful summers ahead!!!

Life is an endless wait...

Life is an endless wait...

Wait to be born, wait to have the first tooth.

Wait to be a teenager, Wait to pass out of school.

Wait for the first best friend, wait for first crush.

Wait for the first cycle, Wait for that first adrenalin rush.

Wait to earn that first cheque, Wait for the first night out.

Wait to get your own room, wait to laugh out loud.

Wait to have someone you commit your life to.

Wait to take on the responsibility of u two.

Wait to drop ur kids to school on Day-1, wait to see them grow.

Wait to celebrate ur teen's birthday, with a raised brow.

Life moves fast. Time even faster...

All these years, u've strived to make it only better.

Watever it be, don't let urself wait too much,

Cz life's pleasures come uninvited, remember, as such...

All it needs is just a thought...

Imagine a world which never knew that nature had painted the plants green;

That the polar bears were white and the tigers had ACTUALLY been.

When every human soul would be penetrated by flesh-melting sun rays;

When air-conditioners would become a sweet memory of the good-old-days.

When water shall still exist, and so shall its thirst;

It’d be the nature’s way to teach us to put “first things first”.

When elevators would stop, when sky-scrapers would become haunted;

It’d be that day, that the human would curse himself for turning the perfect picture tainted.

So, when the time still remains, don’t get yourself caught;

Coz all it needs is just a thought.

Whatever have we acquired from our ancestors is not our property;

That we pass this onto the next generation safely is our liability.

So, use whatever we “need” to, and make sure it is replenished;

Coz there is no end to a man’s greed, either otherwise or famished.

Let’s be aware and stand against the injustice done to Mother Earth;

Lat the hands come together to make Earth a better place to live and eliminate the appalling dearth.

Coz, of course, we wouldn’t want our grandchildren to stare with empty eyes;

On our mention that once upon a time, on the mountains and poles, existed a thing called ICE…

Another let down...

Hi all!!

Yet another time has come that i have been thrown an opportunity and have failed, not miserably though. In yet another essay writing competition, for which i had sent my entry, i lost. Not that i feel bad. But, now i realise that just being good doesnt help. You have to be the best, or...atleast better than the rest. Else, being good is no good.

This is what i had written. Judge for yourselves.

India has betrayed the martyrdom of its freedom fighters

Shaheedo ki chitaao par lagenge har baras mele;

Vatan par mitne vaalo ka yahi aakhiri nishaan hoga…

It’s amazing to see how just a couple of lines can induce patriotism in an otherwise-dormant-patriot. Reminds me of The singing legend Lata Mangeshkar, clad in a crisp white cotton sari, standing elegantly at the India Gate, teary eyed, singing “Ae mere vatan ke logo…” The song was powerful enough to make it impossible for us to fight back our tears.

It is, surely, at times like these that a sudden urge crawls in, to do something for the land that has given you so much, while you are still spared with atleast some breaths more. But, it takes just a pragmatic thought to shun the idea away. For some fraction of a second, we might feel guilty of being selfish but then, it’s somehow more comfortable sitting back home, and shedding tears for the departed than going to the frontiers and let others back home do the same for you.

Now, a question creeps in. Who would, in our country, go on to join the Indian Army knowing the meager recognition and compensation provided?

Besides, of course, if he/she sees nothing but a row of badges on their chest when they grow up, or even dying for their motherland, since the day they get their first toy gun.

I would say, majorly the GOI is to be blamed for this. Not only is the contribution of the valiant soldiers given due recognition, but also the families of the martyrs are driven endlessly for the scanty pension posthumous. The only time we come to know who did what during which break-out is the Republic Day when these soldiers/families of the martyrs are awarded.

One thing that I have come to notice of late and is not appreciable is that India Gate, the centre of attention of the National Capital Territory of the Republic of India bears the names of 90,000 soldiers of the erstwhile British Indian Army who lost their lives fighting for the British Indian Empire, or more correctly the British Empire in India British Raj in World War I and the Afghan Wars. Where are the names of the Indians who died in scores of wars be it against Pakistan or China or even the British Raj itself, for that matter.

“No guts, No glory” is what their official website claims. Surely, people who jump into the Army have the craving that makes them blind to the other side of this issue and which becomes trivial to them then. I remember, there was a time, around the Indian Independence era when atleast one of the many progenies of every Punjabi family was sacrificed to the service of the nation. That was the spirit of India then. Even now, when people there own limousines and likes, the feeling has hardly died. If at all it does, the morning and evening services at wagah border is enough reignite the spirit. They give meaning to the lines “Us desh ki sarhad ko koi choo nahi sakta, dis desh ki sarhad pe nigebaan hai ye aankhein.”

A country stands strong when its citizens feel for it. The 3 armed forces represent its combined force. India possesses the courage and strength to give a hard time to any super-power in the world. The need is just to incubate it and take care that it doesn’t die down. We are huge in number. The catch is to channelize the passion and spirit of the youth in the right direction, for the good of the nation, else:

Two men have the arms and power to use them. What makes a soldier different from a terrorist is his responsibility to use them both.

Are we really what we are?

Hi to all!!!

This time...though original, i want to put up an article that i wrote sometime back for the college magazine but the board dint find it substantial enuf to publish.... :-)

No worries!!! Its here now:

Why are mad people called just that - “mad”, ever thought of it? No! I am not accusing you. Even I myself didn’t, until sometime now. Anyways, the answer is, according to me, too controversial. Actually what I feel is, mad people are ‘mad’ because they have no inhibitions.

The “sane” world is, we can call, a bunch of people trying to confirm to the society-led norms. Therefore, experiencing (read showcasing) extreme fear, anxiety, pleasure or any emotion is out of question. What they do all the time is to present themselves as a composed personality, no matter how hollow they are from within.

This remembers me of Charlie (the escapist, remember?), the central character of the first chapter of class 12 English course book (Vistas) - “The Third Level”. “Sane” people like him are the ones who, fed up with the monotony of life, seek new avenues, even if it means thinking ‘out of the box’ or…….being called “mad”.

In class 12, though, the chapter merely held any importance except as a medium for fetching marks. But now, I see its relevance.

Another funny, yet notable thing that’s worth mentioning here is the “Pagalpanti bhi zaroori hai” ad campaign. I mean, how truly and honestly and of course, successfully these people have come up with an idea such as this! Kudos!!

Ok. Coming back to the main point, the society is gradually getting converted into a kind of…..mmmm…….machine, if I can put it this way. I mean, if I don’t feel like saying “excuse me” if I sneeze, then will the people out there hang me? Or, if a colleague of mine irritates me endlessly, why can’t I just shout back at him/her and stop the torture for once and for all??!!!

The problem is we put in so much of effort in showcasing ourselves as someone who the world wants to see as, and not what we actually are.

In the process of complying with the protocols, we miss out on our inclination, what we want to be.

The other day, I came across a father-son duo, on a verge of fight, where the son insisted on being a painter (the one who paints on canvas, and not walls!!). The father had this to say – “Fine. You want to paint. But, what do you want to do in life?” ahem! No comments on that.

Does only being a manager, or a doctor, teacher, scientist (and the list never ends…..) mean something to do???

But as it is, all these talks make sense only on this sheet of paper. If we go around talking about our “inclination”, we’ll be called MAD! So, watch out!

Har kisi ko mukkammal jahan nahi milta, kahin pe zameen to kahin aasmaan nahi milta;
Saans lene ko jeena kahe to hum jeete zarur hain, bas har saans me Khuda nahi milta…

Hi to all..
I beg your pardon for the pathetic line that I added to the amazing first line…

U know, sometimes…..sometimes when you make the balance-sheet of ur life, even when the liabilities equal the assests, u feel something major lacks. A void is born…
Today, the same void is born within me and with every minute passing, it grows wider and deeper. I, technically, should not have any reason to feel the blues. I am what I wanted to be. I am what others aspire to be. But, I am not at peace with myself. I even don’t know what is it that’s upsetting my soul or at what time did it all begin…
I have been doubting my cerebral parts even more since I read the article about a girl, around 23, a native of Bangalore, who suffered from this acute ailment (I’ve absolutely forgotten the name). She, at times, would be the most happiest and chirpy, with/without any reason. And the other times, she had to be pulled out of a serious depression by her parents. This became news when this year, on New Year’s Eve, she persisted on going to goa alone to bring in the New Year, and in a fit of over-happiness died of over consumption of drugs…
Though mine is not that extreme a case, still I feel that I am inching towards it with every day passing. I don’t know. Sometimes, a certain situation that made me happy would, at some other time, infuriate me. This happens with me a lot!!! Seems like people don’t interest me for long. I knew very well that I m not a people’s person. But that I am this big an escapist, I dint know. I find it sad, but not surprising.
Many times I think of dying a graceful death. But then, the notion of it brings goosebumps to me. And then, if I read a book that’s based on a theme like “Death-the ultimate and the only truth of life”, I see it in an altogether different light. I believe that I would die peacefully and that I would accept with open arms.
My idea wasn’t to write anything about dying or death. Sorry. The point was, my mind catches a gamut of frequencies, all as different from each other as Obama and Bush. And some are deadly too. And…this leaves me acting impulsively to situations that required utter calmness and maturity to be handled. Because then, everything comes down to a very micro level. To me, what all is visible is just the fact that the other person has made me extremely happy/ sad and now, he/she is a friend/foe for life.
What can be a better example of my insanity than the fact that as I have come to the end of this post, my mood has swayed from VERY negative to VERy negative to VEry negative to Very negative to negative to just normal…..
God help me…

For the first time, I don’t want to let the mystery remain…

m luvin it...

Of late, I haven’t been writing much,

Whenever I m down, I write, the trend has been such.

Last year had me scribbling down the maximum poems so far,

Was I melancholy, was I sad, was life a bit ajar?

I learnt a lot, if I am to summarize about the last year,

I overcame a miserable break-up, came out of every restriction, every fear.

Suddenly, life has taken a beautiful turn,

There is so much more to it than what I thought, I did learn.

Discovering my two ‘FRIENDS FOREVER’ has been the biggest success,

No more wasting away time in useless emotions on useless people, finally I’ve been able to come out of the big mess!!!

I wish life remains the way it is now,

But life, as it is, will never be the same, no matter what or how.

I only wish to have a nicer tomorrow, if the today was nice,

I have, finally, started relishing from the big cake, my share of slice.

Today, here I am, writing yet another one of its kind,

Not coz I am sad or melancholy, but because I am happy this time…

The "Wanderer" called ME....

Hi to all!!
This time, the reason for my prolonged absence (yet again) is different and not-so-usual. I have been too busy visiting new places and being out of town (and out of state too! Fuh!) to keep this space updated. And as I always maintain, every aam-aadmi is special in a unique way, I also have been experiencing a sea of emotions - joys, disappointments, let-downs, sudden rush of blood in my cheeks, the anticipation of what the next morning might bring, waking up in a different atmosphere among different people and then realizing m far….far away from home. It’s all been good so far. I have learnt a lot. The past month seems to have added more than a couple of years to my age.

The ‘Mood Indigo’ Bombay trip
My first ever ‘college’ trip. I say ‘college’ because officially and technically, I was supposed to represent my college in some or the other competition. Though I hardly intended to do that…(and I say that off records here!!). All we 9 did was…explore the city as much as we could. The trip made me realize that I, too, can be a responsible creature whenever it is required of me. (I wish my mum could see me, only through the detective eye, in those 8 days.)
Secondly, m amazed at how some people in the group turned out so unexpectedly wonderful and amazing!! Now I seriously hope to hold on to those wonderful ties I developed with them…..
And, I always supposed that I needed a sumptuous sleep of 10 hrs.a day. This trip opened my eyes to the fact that I can still manage to be in my senses after keeping awake for 3 whole days with a lil sleep of less than 10 hrs in total! I luved the fact that at any and all points of time, I was surrounded with people of my age, with whom I could relate myself to, people who knew the challenges and opportunities that our world is full of.
The only things we did were…..we ate, we walked around, commuting thru locals, we shared secrets, we played, and that’s how we were throughout the 8 day excursion.
And yes! How can I forget mentioning the 22nd of December!! When ur best frnd, for no specific reason, decides to travel more than a 1000kms. just because u had said that u felt alone in the strange city, and decides to take a 1 day trip, traveling by air, for the first time, all by himself, without letting his parents know, and spending more than double of what u would spend in 8 days in a single day for that…….(sigh!) u can not afford to forget to mention it!!
So, I really was looking forward to his arrival. And when the day arrived, all the anticipation, kind of, vanished. I could smell something fishy but I wanted to believe that he is upto it out of the love for his dearest frnd. Well, I wanted to keep it light. And when we decided upon a common place to go, I led the way (since I was familiar to the cities by 2 days. And so, I knew which route to take! I luved leading a guy especially when it came to the routes… girls aren’t their best when it comes to something like this.). Nyways, we had a wonderful time. ‘Wonderful’ would be a small and incomplete word to describe that day. And unfortunately, as every good thing eventually has to come to an end, so did his trip to Mumbai. He, with utmost chivalry, dropped me to the place where I joined the rest of my group and he himself headed for the airport…. I still can not come to terms with the fact that my “bholu” took such big step just to ensure that his frnd was fine…….I was fine. God Bless Him!
Those were the 8 days of complete freedom and fun. Time was ours, we weren’t answerable to anyone. It was OH JUST SO AWESUM!!! In a room to accommodate 2 hosteliers, 6 could be accommodated on a temporary basis, while we were 9 girls stuffed in one poor room. I say poor becoz, very obviously, by the tym 8th day approached; the room’s condition was dismal.

Lifelong experience at Darbar Sahib
I had, virtually, not even unpacked my bags completely after returning from Bombay, that I saw myself heading towards Amritsar, the land famous for ‘amritsari kulche’. So, with the sweet memories of the recent trip still afresh in my mind and soul, I prepared myself to assimilate even sweeter and fond memories of the anticipated trip. This one was with my family (excluding my bro, as usual…..whenever there is a full-family gathering, he prefers to go invisible) and my aunt’s. It was an experience that m gna cherish throughout my life. Without ny offenses to the religion to which I “supposedly” belong, Hinduism, I REALLY found Sikhism very fascinating, enduring and clean. Consider it our luck; we visited the pious pilgrimage on the eve of Gurupurab. And it was so grandly decorated, just like a bride on her wedding day. It was a treat to stand still and absorb the beauty around the place. The entrance was the most usual one, nothing grand or special about it. But once u were in, there was a diffrnt ambience altogether. Everything was well-organized and fresh. As soon as I entered the main premises (sorry I don’t know xactly wat it’s called), I knew I was gna fall in luv wid the place. And so I did! Earlier, I was indifferent to all religions and the way they are conducted. But now, after this eye-opening visit, I m sure I have started developing faith towards Sikhism. The interpretation of wat I just declared is very subjective. But, I just said what I know I feel. Everything, there, was soothing to the nerves. The mellow hymns melted in the soul and even when I could not make out the lyrics exactly, I enjoyed and hummed them all the while. The near 0 degree temperature too, for once, lost its affect on me as I walked barefoot along the sarovar and the main darbar, mesmerized.
I, while being all-good to Darbar Sahib, almost forgot to mention Jallianwala Bagh, famous for the massacre that happened in 1918… As I entered the historic and no less tragic place, a chill ran thru me. I felt that the land where I was standing, some 90 years back, witnessed the gunning down of more than 2000 innocent souls. Then, no one was a muslim, or hindu, or sikh. Everyone was an Indian and with that feeling had they gathered peacefully at the bagh. A stone pyramid, of about a feet read “Bullets were fired from here” and from the entrance, to the right of the pyramid, lit the “Amar Jyoti”, in remembrance of the departed. There too, in a font bigger than that of “Amar Jyoti”, a circular board read “Indian Oil Corporation”, the company that sponsors the oil used in the lamp. Commercialization at its peak, I guess…
And what annoyed me is the fact that the bagh has been completely modified and it rather looked more like a picnic spot than a heritage site. This pissed me off big tym. Tourists and interested ppl like us travel this much just to see a couple of bullet marks (actually 28 of them), a well (actually, ‘The’ well), some boards that tell the history of the bagh. I would anytym prefer the original, rusty bagh instead of the new, fancy hang-out place. But I guess the government had its reasons for taking such action.

If I had it my way, I would never stop talking about Bombay and Amritsar… But, everything looks appropriate and good if it stays in the limits. And so, without saying anything else, I’d let u think wat m upto ;-)
See u soon…….till then, as I say…….Let the mystery remain!!!