Elixir

"Hope is a Good thing, maybe the best of things." someone had said (and i am not referring to respected Stephen King here)and HOW!!

This one is not about a certain "he" or "she", but about things that make a bigger difference - HOPE & FAITH.

So what if u fall, there is always a next time to stand tall with a stronger spine...and shine.
So what if you fear the consequences, its the journey that decides where are you headed.
To hear is one thing, to listen to and ponder upon it is altogether another.

There is never a wrong or a right decision. You have to take a leap of faith and then... its only you and YOUR decision because he who tries may fail, but he who doesn't has already.

It was amazing how brilliantly and effortlessly had he talked her into seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. And while at it, MAKING her believe that there does exist light at the end of the tunnel.

"Are you afraid of working hard?" was the question that got her off the hook.
She could'v easily dodged it, or replied defensively with "Ofcourse not...d'uh"
but the truth "Yes, I am afraid to work hard" would always resound in her. And she knew better.

He might not have provided her with a solution, the destination. But, he sure converted the maze into a single straight road at one end of which, stood she and the other end had her destination.
This was more than she could'v asked for... ever.

Now her belief " I am just not good enough" was clearly replaced with his "You aren't as bad as you think."

If anything... this was a miracle. Nothing less.

EXPLANATION...

U owe me an explanation.
Actually, tonnes of explanations.

The 7-year –itch has already started surfacing between us when its
only been 4 years now. And with time, you’re only getting worse.
I wish I had the capability of hearing your mind out loud. When I try
and talk, u never even show any sign of paying attention.
Damn! You don’t even fake it.

I wish I could throw a vase at you, like I did the other day, only to
miss you by an inch. That day, you really shouldn’t have commented on
my newly-done hair-color. Because the vase was your mother’s and you
had a hard time giving all the explanations to her later.
See! Like I said. You r always landing yourself in giving explanations!

Anniversaries went right by us, rather-me, you never cared to wake up
from your sweet slumber.

You remember my first birthday that we celebrated together? Ofcourse u
held a private screening of my favorite Nicolas Sparks movie. You also
gifted me a tissue box wrapped in fancy red. I know how you detest
alkl the romantic stuff on tabloid, but that was the best present
ever. Whatching my fav movie, wrapped in your arms while u wiped off
the tears down my cheeks from the gifted tissues.

And you remember the adventure trip we took 2 years ago? You went on
to climb an extra mile because u saw a spring at the top and I was
thirsty. I kept shouting at the top of my voice- I have it in my
bottle! Don’t go! That’s a dangerous terrain!

I wish you had heard me then.

You never reached that spring. And you never came back, to me, too.
You’ve broken the promise of being with me forever…of loving me forever.

Now if you could just get up from the piece of land where u’ve been
resting forever...

Because…u owe me an explanation.

आशाएं २०११

THE SUN shone brightly, the day was beautiful.
The rainbow was its usual 7 colors, but somehow, the feeling wasn’t full.

It was then, that we set out to dream and conquer,
A bunch of guys and girls, with just a vision and an empty bunker.

People came along, the dream got bigger.
The vision found its way to a beautiful picture.

The picture which we all are trying to paint the color of humanity and empathy.
Seeing them smile and live atleast a day of their lives the way they deserve, shall be our victory

Tomorrow
The sun will shine brightly; the day will be beautiful,
The rainbow will be its usual 7 colors and we’ll be happy to have made a small part of the world cheerful.

The Baggage and The Morrow

It is the time of the day when you want to come home to a person who takes the baggage off your shoulders. The baggage of tiredness, exhaustion, drowsiness, dejection and sometines...hopelessness.

No matter how you manage to keep yourselves occupied throughout the day- sometimes may be to avoid the thought of being lonely to strike and other times just to tire yourself to the extent that at the end of the day you crash on your bed, already half-asleep, to sleep the night away...dreamlessly.

But for some, even being on their toes doesnt help.
They have had a long day. True. They are in dire need of a good human sleep. Again True. But when they recline to their space, another world-one of their own-opens up to them. Their own clock starts ticking.

They find all the inertia accumulated throughout the day has evaporated. They feel charged up...to dream with eyes open, to plan love (ironically), to wish and to hope.

This space, their "Eat, Pray, Love" zone takes them away from the hassles of real life and strained relationships, into a world that they want to build.

And the real life sleep that follows is sweet, full of optimism.

The body is put to rest while the heart and mind, together, say- TOMORROW IS ANOTHER DAY...

Life and Fevicol...

Hi all...
Just another day when i had decided to get a bit organised, I started out with cleaning the dust off my desk. I made separate room for literally everything, including a tube of fevicol whose cap had run loose.
So... it took me a good couple of hours to set things right but I felt immense pride and sense of worth after I was done.

At bedtime, when i had this urge to see the beautiful town that I had resurrected in the afternoon, I pulled out the drawers one-by-one. I didn't know this would take the next 60 minutes of my already sleep-deprived soul.

For a couple of seconds, i could not realize what was wrong with the third drawer and its contents.

Then it struck me that the fevicol tube had tilted and the cap had goner for a stroll, alone. And the city was, obviously, painted white.

I was more vexed than sorry. My favorite candies had drowned in the white, I had an urge to throw the entire drawer out the window at once.
But i decided against it and carried the drawer to the4 bathroom.

As i lifted every single thing out of the box, i realized the situation was stickier than i had assumed.

And it was then that this post was conceived. As I was running water over the washables, like the 3 inkpots and color boxes, and had dumped the rest, like some papers and *ouch* the candies, I realized there were patterns and cuts on them that I had never noticed, not before now when they were filled with fevicol and I was made to take it out of them.

I realized how similar life is. There always is a tacit part in relations that we keep closest to our hearts. We might never realize it. But, when the relations are drowned in the fevicol of problems, do we see all those areas that we thought never existed before.

Only... here I could wash them clean and put them back in their place.

While relations are more like the unwashables that I had dumped...thoughtlessly.

Yet another Outburst

I wish I sleep tonight and never wake up again, never see the Sun again, take the memories of this dark sans-moon night in my eyes and close them forever...
I wish I never see anyone of the people-with whom I've shared my life of 20 yrs.-again. I am just so sick. So tired. So exhausted. So spent.
Rational thinking has given way and now I only wish I had never lived that day, when the truth was revealed, when my beliefs shattered. When i felt like an orphan.

Yes. I could never rise above that fact. And i could not even live with it. So, i chose the mid-way. I chose to hate those very people who, once upon a time & for the most part of my life, were my life.

It was difficult, ask me. But i was determined not to get hurt by anyone after that one incident. I kept my stride. I always won. I would hurt people, so they wouldn't, couldn't, hurt me back. But, i was only a loser. War has no victors. My soul would die, daily...a part of it.

I would sneer at my people- at their agony, at my victory- victory over something certainly unknown. But when i woke up, when- for a second- I saw the world around me without the glasses of hatred on, I saw my own people- agonized, pained, suffering.

I realized what i had done was not to them, but to my own mortal self. As it is, life is never an exam where u could cut out the whole answer attempted wrongly and make a fresh beginning. It is about life. If i do it wrong, it is wrong forever.

I wish i dont wake up tomorrow, or any morrow for that matter...

ek ghaav tha, jo bhar gaya...ek nishaan hai, jo reh gaya.

He and I were completely engrossed in each other, only, he was 50 kms. away and I was on the middle of a road, trying to cross it to reach the station that would take me to him.
As i put a step forward, my heart and mind still with him, my knee jerked and the first step I took brought me down, right on my knees.
It was a wound. But, with my heart and mind still with him, I knew nothing could possibly go wrong. That that was nothing.
Though afterwards, he did tell me how awful the wound was and that i must tend to it.
But i, being myself, ignored it out of the fear of ignoring him.
Now i realize. I did not have my eyes on the path that i had chosen & so, I got hurt-right at the place where it hurt the most.

Now, though the wound has healed, the scar remains. And THIS is everything I have of him...of us.